Kukamu Poems
by KukamuLover101
Summary: Why is my life so complicated? Look what happened to me...now he left me too. What am I going to do now? *Rated T for safety!* Please Review! If you don't, it makes me think that people won't read it.
1. Problems

~Kukamu~  
>~Love Story:Part1~<br>***I re-did it because I didn't preview and look over it! Sorry...**

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><p><em><strong>She hurts and she cries, but you can't see the depression in her eyes, because she just smiles.<strong>_

__**~Amu's POV~**

I sat there lifeless, waiting for him to burst through my door any minute. But, he wouldn't…He now has a beautiful model-like girlfriend and I'm not wanted anymore…I have to let go even though it would hurt too much…I frowned, feeling the hole in my heart growing bigger. I felt the chocking feeling come as I tried to keep the tears in. Why Kukai…Why do this to me, to you, to us? You broke me…Broke my will to live…I have to throw my life away thanks to you now.

**Without you…I'm nothing**

I wrote the last word and ran to Kukai's house. I placed the letter through the mail slot in the door. I frowned. No one will forgive me for this. As I was about to leave, the door slammed open. I turned around in surprise to see Kukai. I looked up at him with a small fake smile. "Hi Kukai."

"Yo Amu-chan…What are you doing here?" I still felt lifeless, even though he's right in front of me, talking to me. Nothing can fix the giant hole in my heart that he caused…

"Oh…I just had to drop that off for you. Well, I have to be getting to the beach, I have some business I need to take care of…" I turned around and started walking, until he grabbed my wrist.

"Wait Amu-chan…Wanna hang out later, like old times?" I turned around, trying to push the depression out of my eyes. I gave a phony smile.

"Sure…meet me at the beach later…That's what that note actually says…" I fake giggled. He nodded and closed the door.

"See you later!" He smiled. I nodded and walked home sadly getting ready for what was cooing up ahead.

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><p><strong>Aki: Cliffy! Hope you enjoyed it! Another chapter will come up soon.<strong>

**Ja Ne!**


	2. Doubts: Part 1

~Kukamu~  
>~Love Story:Part 2~<p>

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><p><em><strong>Sometimes in a tragedy we find our life's purpose.<strong>_

__**~Amu's POV~**

I rushed home felling a sad aura trailing behind me. What have I done? We've been friends for years and now I'm doing this to him. I tried to push him out of my mind and tried to think of my other friends, but I failed miserably. Kukai…what am I going to do? I trudged into my room. "Mom…Dad…Ami?" I called out, trying to see if hay came back. I frowned. They could never come back…They're…They're…

**They're dead…**

That memory still haunts me. Gnawing at me, eating my soul…The problem is that only me and the rest of my family know. I haven't told my friends yet. First my family, now Kukai… All of my friends became too busy to help with my sadness.

**Rima** is spending a lot more time bounden with her parents and she started to date Nagihiko. **Nagi** is focusing on basketball, working on hip hop dancing now, and is going on a lot of dates with Rima. **Yaya** has to take care to Tsubasa more, going to ballet more and has a lot of guardian meetings. **Tadase** is working as class president, helping her grandma, and cheering Utau and Ikuto on their dreams.

** And…Kukai** is dating Utau now. He is working on a lot of sports so he could get a scholarship. Even though he's really busy, he pays attention to me the most. So what if we talk every weekend, and he buys me ice cream, and what if he hugs me when I'm sad…I felt the tears flow out again. I really didn't want to do this, but I have too. When he started dating Utau, he payed more attention to her than to me...

**Now I'm alone…He was my only chance, my ONLY hope… **

The tears silently fell, one by one as I grabbed a piece of paper. I wrote and wrote. My vision was blurred and some tears stained the paper. I folded it up and put it in my nice white cardigan. I started going through all my clothing, replacing my clothes with a purple sundress. Frills at the hem and soft purple flowers adorned it. I had to dress up right? I looked at the time. 4:27…almost time. I put on my cardigan with the note in it and slipped in nice sandals. I usually never dressed like this, but since it's time, I decided I should…I ran out the door deciding to lock it, even though I may not come back any time soon. I walked over to the beach, still deciding if this was the best decision or not. I lost faith in Kukai, I thought he was not going to come. I looked behind me and made sure. No one was here… A silent tear rolled down my cheek. I took of my cardigan and laid it on the sand. I walked slowly over to the water still having doubts.

**Should I be doing this?**

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><p><strong>That's all for now! I'll post the next one soon!<strong>

**Ja Ne! ~Aki-chan**


	3. Doubts: Part 2

~Kukamu~  
>~Love Story:Part 3~<p>

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><p><strong>Thinking of you keeps me awake, Dreaming of you keeps me asleep, Being with you keeps me aloof, but most of all: Loving you keeps me happy.<strong>

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><p><strong>~Amu's POV~<strong>

My feet inched closer to the water, but my mind was telling me to get away. I pushed away my thoughts. This was for the best…My toes finally touched the water, the cold feeling sent a shiver through my body. Did I want to do this? What about all of my friends? Utau, Yaya, Rima, Nagi, Tadase…Kukai. What will happen? Now I noticed that the water went to me knees. Almost there…No Amu, this is what you want, right? But…But…Kukai…How will I live not to see his face everyday? What will happen when my world turns…

**…into darkness? **

Now, I noticed that the water went up to my stomach. Almost there…This is it! No turning back now, Amu! I could feel my dress cling to my body and my body become tingly and numb. Finally, It went up to my chest. When I was about to jump, I heard someone shout.

**Amu Hinamori, What the hell do you think your doing?**

My eyes widened and turned around quickly, my shocked gold eyes meeting enraged emerald eyes. "K-Kukai! Um…Well you see…Um…" I stood there worried and shocked truing to find the right words to say.

"Amu, Shut up and come here now." He said sternly. He sounded like and angry coach or dad. I slumped out of the water, feeling cold. I shivered until Kukai ran up to me and hugged me. His warmth enveloped me while I tried to conseal my smile. "Amu…w-why are you doing this? W-Were you about to…" His voice sounded distressed and sad. "Why Amu? Are you just going to…

**…throw your life away like that?"**

"Kukai…I-I'm sorry…I was…I was really-"

"Depressed? What caused you to do this…Amu?" Should I tell him? I debated in my mind while he stood there watching me. I felt a tear stroll down me cheek.

"Kukai…I…"

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><p><strong>HAHAHAHA! Cliffy! I'm so evil...<strong>

**Ja ne! ~Aki-chan**


	4. Arigato

~Kukamu~  
>~Love Story:Part 4~<p>

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><p><strong>A strong person knows how to keep their life in line. With tears in their eyes, still manages to say. "Nah, I'm fine.<strong>

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><p><strong>Amu's POV<strong>

"Kukai…I…" I felt my voice trail away, trying to find a way to explain to him. I felt a pain absorb my heart, and I fell to my knees while tears washed over my face. He stood there shocked. He knelt to my level and frowned.

"Amu…"

"Kukai, let me explain first…I was depressed because…because I was lonely. I was all alone in the darkness while everyone lived their perfect lives, but me. When Rima and Nagi started dating, they were too busy on dates to visit. Tadase has been helping Utau and Ikuto a lot. Yaya is still helping the younger guardians. And you…you started dating Utau and have been playing a lot of sports recently, making us apart from each other. I know I'm acting like a selfish brat…But it feels like I lost my Onii-chan…" I frowned, still leaving out an important thing. His eyes showed worry and sorrow. He grabbed my shoulders and looked into my eyes.

"Amu, I told you before. If you have any problems, you can tell me. Please don't just…

…**leave me like that…**

That would make everyone sad. If I haven't stopped you, this would be a big regret and mistake to your life and it would be stuck with you forever. Please don't be silent about it. Tell me and I will try my best to help. I just want to see you smiling and happy." His face softened. I smiled, even though I was crying. Kukai reached over and touched my cheek.

**"Amu, you are strong because you are an amazing girl that can smile though her own tears and tough times. You are strong and don't forget that."**

I sat there shocked yet happy. I hugged him, burying my head into his chest. I felt warm because of Kukai. I felt happier just sitting in his arms. "Kukai…Arigato." I smiled up to him, a rare smile that I haven't given to anyone for a long time. I whispered, "I love you Kukai." But quietly so he didn't hear. I hope he'd notice now…

**...I hope he does soon…**

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><p><strong>DONE! Hope you liked it! I'm working on a Kukamu Christmas fix, but it may take some time…ANYWAYS! BYE BYE! ~Aki-chan<strong>

**P.S- MERRY CHRISTMAS!**


	5. What about Utau?

~Kukamu~  
>~Love Story:Part 5~<p>

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><p><strong>Laugh as long as you breath &amp; Love as long as you live.<strong>

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><p><strong>Kukai's POV<strong>

_**"I love you Kukai…"**_

Her whisper cut though me. It felt like it split my heart in two. I'm already dating Utau, she knows that, right? But…

**I love her too.**

I can't just leave Utau though…So I'm in love with 2 girls, even though I'm already dating one of them while the other is my best friend. I mentally cursed and sighed while Amu clung onto me. Her face was red from crying and her eyes were slowly letting tears fall out. I hugged her back, clutching her small frame and smiling. Do I love Amu or Utau.

_**'You're supposed to love Amu, you were in love with her when you saw her for the first time.'**_

Daichi? Is that you? I smiled softly and went for it. I kissed Amu on her head, while her pink hair was tickling me in the process. She looked up shocked, her face a bit redder than before. I smiled as her expression softened. Finally, my heart felt right. "I love you too." I said gently. Amu's face lit up with joy, until her expression became sad again.

**"What about Utau?"**

I grinned sadly. How was I going to tell Utau anyways?

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><p><strong>Uh-oh...What's Kukai gonna do now?<strong>

**Sorry that this was really short and that I haven't uploaded in like 5 days! I'M SOOOOOO SORRY!**

**Anyways, Ja-ne! **

**~Aki-chan**


	6. I Can't Do This Anymore

~Kukamu~  
>~Love Story:Part 6~<p>

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><p><strong>I'm glad that I met you because if I didn't, I would have never fell in love with you in the first place.<strong>

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><p><strong>Amu's POV<strong>

I grinned at his confession, his love confession. He then kissed my head, which had me blush in the process.

**"I love you too."**

Those few seconds made my life and heart feel loved and happy again. I then frowned as I remembered he was dating someone else. That someone named Hoshina Utau. Barely a whisper I asked, "What about Utau?" How were we going to tell Utau? How will she react to this? This is considered cheating! I can't make Kukai cheat on Utau. Utau may break into sadness like I did…

**I don't want anybody else to feel the sadness that I felt.**

I let go of Kukai and held onto his hands. I felt my emotionless expression come back. I took a deep breath thinking of what to say. I looked into his mesmerizing emerald eyes and said softly. "Kukai…

**I can't do this anymore.**

I can't make Utau feel bad or she might be depressed, just like I was. I don't want anyone else to feel the sadness that I felt. I don't want this to happen. I'm sorry. I love you too and don't you forget that. I hope you understand. I don't want to break you two apart. You should at least tell her about this, or else this would be a problem for the future. Undertand?" I looked at his face as he flashed a smile in understanding.

"Yeah, yeah I know Amu. You don't need to go on and on like that though." He said boredly and smiled a cheeky smile. I punched his arm playfully in return.

"Let's just be friends for now, kay?"

"Sure." We both stood up from the sand. I hugged him one last time and pecked his tan cheek. I waved and walked home, happy that Kukai was able to knock me into my senses.

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><p><strong>Hi Hi! I'm really sorry guys, it's been a LONG time. I didn't want to turn into those writers that take months to write a new chapter! So, I hope you all enjoyed this! I was going to make a Christmas or New Years fic earlier, but couldn't. Well, I hope you guys keep reading my stories!<strong>

**Bye Bye!**

**~Aki-chan**


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